The random ways people get around the elephant in the room -

Tiptoeing as quickly as possible through the room: An advertising rep who had a chatting acquaintance with me, I only speak to her about twice a month and at health fairs and the like, so an acquaintance usually asks how my son is, asked me about when I would be going on maternity leave with Aeryn, and so forth; we have kids close in age and she had just come back from a maternity leave about a month after I found out I was pregnant with Aeryn. She called today for the first time when I've been on phone duty since. She didn't even ask about my son, just kind of a hushed "I hope you're doing ok" and on to business. This is a woman who normally has a pretty reasonable length conversation, and she was on and off the phone in less than a minute and a half.

Stomping around yelling about the elephant and bringing a herd to join it: A relative who shall remain unidentified. She asks my mother if it would be alright to get me something for the garden we're making or if it might remind me too much of Aeryn. Did we know so and so has it so much worse? They have a kid who has a birthmark, it's not really disfiguring but they think it might not fade away. Did you know x person you never heard of died last week? Sure they were 84 and you never heard of them, but how do you think it makes me feel?

Pointing at the elephant and making a query before walking on: My son's dentist. Nicely acknowledged that I had been pregnant last time I was in, said sorry when I said what had happened, said we'd be in his prayers, then cleaned and counted some teeth and told me I needed to get myself to an adult dentist pronto, and got an appointment set up with a colleague of his next Wednesday. Did I mention he actually threw me in the kiddie chair and had a look at my broken tooth? When there's nothing else to do, do what you're good at, I guess.

Anyone else had any tiptoes or stomping going on? What do you do about it, if anything? Is that "rule of thirds" really a rule, and can I pick the teams?

Our neighbours barely speak to us now...all very awkward and apparently after ONE confrontation 'all my fault'

Which is why I want to move. I want my life to start anew without their prying eyes

I don't have anyone that really tip toes around me but I don't have anyone that asks about my son anymore. Sometimes I wish someone would just mention his name or say anything at all about him. Its almost like he was never born. That kind of makes me feel down. I am sorry you have had so many bad experiences with people.

Sending you lots of love :)

Carly x